Monday, November 30, 2009

Reasoning to Death


Daughter of Eve, my footsteps trace hers.
Countless times, my mind, reasoning betrays
In the shadow of the garden an enemy lurks
Twisting truth. I reason. Add my thoughts to promises
Stepping into the same trap.
Doubting God's Word over my life. Simple directions.

Daughter of Eve, I question His goodness.
Will He always take care of me?
Reasoning enters. Doubt festers.
My soul inches toward the snare.

Why even listen to the snake?
Wisdom says smack him upside the head and silence the brute.
Reason says listen to what he offers.
How many times have I chosen reason only to ensnare myself?

Reason alone fails me.
Reason without trust in Jesus brings death.

Eve reasoned that God must be holding out.
She reasoned without trust. death.

Daughter of Eve, my footsteps trace hers.
Reasoning without trust brought death to my life.
This is where my path follows another.
Reasoning failed me. I will put my trust only in Jesus.

A new path. A new season.
Seeing my footsteps of the past.
Redeemed from the curse. Forgiven.
No longer a daughter of Eve.
Daughter of the King, Sarah Dawn.
My footsteps begin to trace His.

In this beautiful journey to intimacy, I am learning. My eyes wide open. Maybe for the first time. My life saved from hell, yet my steps continued to walk towards death. There is more. A deep joy welling from inside of me. I have just begun. There is more to knowing Jesus. Complete abandon. Surrender. A deeper trust that takes my breath away with expectation. To continue on this path, I had to let Jesus go deeper in me, revealing the walls I built to keep Him from all of my heart. Dare to dream there is more. Dare to believe that this life can take your breath away. Dare to ask your Jesus to remove all hindrances to a deeper relationship with Him. Dare to trust that He will.

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For a time, as I journey on this road, this pool will be a quiet reflective place. Come. Soak. Splash along with me as we wade into deeper waters.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Lil' Splash

I know ... I've been swimming in some deep waters these past few weeks. So today, just wanted to splash you from the kiddie pool. I truly am being transformed, and loving every minute of it.
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Monday, November 23, 2009

Tapestry


A friend of mine has a uniquely designed tapestry hugging her floors. Created just for her family, the intricate pattern weaves their initials. Embracing their home, wrapping the floor with the warmth of love, a reminder of the intricate pattern of our lives.

My life, me, Sarah Dawn, on the loom. Rejoicing that my Jesus' skillful hands weave the threads and colors in my life. Well, He desires to weave them. He longs to weave them. But is He? At times, I have taken over ... adding colors and patterns I thought made a "pretty" design.

As I journey on this path to deeper intimacy with Him, the master weaver is having to undo some of my "pretty" work. Ripping, cutting, that His design can be completed. Learning to trust and rest on the loom. In one word, surrender.

Surrender to His pattern for my life. Surrender to His skillful hands. Surrender when I can only see bits and pieces of string. Surrender when I don't know the finished design. Surrender, that His initials will be woven throughout.
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For a time, as I journey on this road, this pool will be a quiet reflective place. Come. Soak. Splash along with me as we wade into deeper waters.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Thirsty

"But whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." - John 4:14

I am on a journey. A journey into deeper intimacy with my Lord. Circumcision of heart. Humbled by His hand. I see the need. To be washed in His love, drenched.

Laying aside times of ministry. Focussing on resting in Him. Just us. Gentle worship. Soaking in the Word. Feeding my soul the nourishment it lacks. Filling my mind with His promises of truth. A journey.

Reading with my children, C.S. Lewis speaks to my heart

"Are you not thirsty?" said the Lion.
"I'm dying of thirst" said Jill.
"Then drink," said the Lion
"May I-could I-would you mind going away while I do? said Jill.

How often in the past have I sought to quench my thirst, on my own, away from His presence? In my own strength, conquering the foe on my own behalf. Did I ever really win? No, only survived the attack. Submerging the real issue down deeper until it surfaces later again in my life.

"I daren't come and drink," said Jill.
Then you will die of thirst," said the Lion.
"Oh dear!" said Jill, coming another step nearer.
I suppose I must go and look for another stream then.
"There is no other stream," said the Lion

Revealed in His love, my pride. I can do this on my own, I can fight this again. Pray harder, develop more self-control, discipline it out of me. Looking for another stream.

Only His stream will quench my thirst. Only His waters will wash away the scars of the past that taint my life. His love. His healing.

Soaking in His songs of love over me. Gently reading the gospels over and over, aloud that they may penetrate my heart and not just linger in my mind. Declaring His promises as a part of my daily bread, feeding His nourishment to my soul. Simple things to come to His waters and allow Him to quench my thirst, and saturate me with His love.


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friends, your comments, precious to me. Yet as I journey on this road, I want to train my ears to His Word and His voice alone speaking over me. For a time, this pool will be a quiet reflective place, to come, soak, follow along with me as we wade into deeper waters.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Pray

My favorite post, today. My heart's desire, to partner with you in prayer. Would you join me today, battling on our knees in prayer?

Leave a prayer request as we storm the gates of hell together, warring side by side. Jesus has given us the ultimate victory, let's walk in that victory today as we battle for one another.

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Thursday, November 12, 2009

Thai Smiles

"Give thanks to the Lord, call on His name; make known among the nations what he has done, and proclaim that His name is exalted." - Isaiah 12:4

5 days after the Tsunami ravished the country, we boarded a plane. To be His hands and feet. To proclaim what the Lord had done in our lives. The Lord moved mountains and provided miraculously for our team, providing a way for us to share the hope of Christ with those who had never heard.

8 adults, 5 children, a group of believers learning to live our faith out loud. We shared Jesus through relationships. Taught at local churches. Discipled young believers. Ministered God's love at orphanages. Interceded at Budhist temples. Baptized in the river. Shined on tuk-tuk's and sungtels sharing the life we have in Christ. So much more.

At night, tucking my 2 year old into his piece of foam on the floor he whispered sweetness. "Mommy, I like serving with Jesus." And it was just the beginning. Serving with Jesus, a way of life for all His children.

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Monday, November 9, 2009

Deep Water


"Put out into deep water." - Luke 5;4

Just as your disciples, you ask me to go deeper.
Deeper into who you are.
Who I am as I gaze at the reflection.

To go deeper, into your truth, I must let go of the shore.
Hugging it. Clutching it. Clinging with sand under my nails.
No longer content to stay on the beach, splashing in waves like a child.

Holy Spirit, guide me.
Take my hand and gently lead.
Teach me to search the deep.

Today, I cut the ties holding me to the shore.

Saturate me today in your deep waters.
Open my eyes that I may see your truths clearly.
No longer murky depths distorting my view.

I am on a beautiful, piercing, humbling, breathtaking journey to intimacy.
In the middle of the deep.
Just me and my Lord, teaching me to walk on the waves.

Wherever we are in our journey, there is more. Never settle. A deeper level of intimacy with the living God awaits me. A deeper level awaits you. Plunge deeper. Soak in only Him. Drip by drip no more, may His love simply saturate.
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Sunday, November 8, 2009

Battling On Our Knees

Teach me the power of prayer, of invading the realm of heaven, taking my role beside you and joining the chorus of intercession as you sit, Son of God, and intercede. 



To catch a glimpse of your heart, to empower my prayers with the fire of heaven burning with intense passion. To truly comprehend the power of my utterances, linking with your dreams for the children you created. To call into existence and partner with your heart's cry.



Take my intercession to the next level, my breath mingling with your sweat and blood shed for the nations. The nice neat box where I deposit my prayers, splinter it by your grace and power.

Usher me into the battle today Lord, in the most humbling and powerful place, on my knees.

Friends, today I invite you to war with me. To use this blog as a weapon of warfare in the hands of our Lord, dipped in the syllables of our prayers.

In the comments to this post, leave me something to battle with you, a prayer request.

And dust off your knees with me, read the requests and mount an arsenal of prayers together, as we battle side by side.

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Friday, November 6, 2009

Enjoy Life

"Go eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart, for it is now that God favors what you do. ... Enjoy life ..." -Eccesiastes 9:7-9

Enjoy the pleasures the Lord wraps in today. Taste the food, no, savor it. His provision.
Squish playdoh in your fingers, giggle with gooeyness.
Plant flowers. Tickle those you love. Snuggle close and wear comfies all day.
Enjoy this time of your life.
Rejoice and let the world see His joy in us.

Sometimes, I forget. Wrapped up in the things I need to do, I forget the things I get to do.
To truly enjoy the daily delights. May His joy bubble over and spill into my day, today.

A snuggle wrestle match. Chalk drawings with budding artists. Fitting my 33 year old body down a slide. Sand angels. Sparkling cider and candles for dinner. Fingerpaint. A few on my list of things to do today. Join me, share your list, and enjoy life today!
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Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Humbled


Knocked to my knees
Weeping for the intimacy I dream
Living in my own strength.
No longer desperate for yours.

A heart closed where communion once reigned.
The confessions of my heart spilling in a Holy Presence.

I have grieved you.
Pulling away into myself.

I long to feel your presence. Raw. Real.
My heart chained from the pain of the past.
Sin of the past.
Choice of the past.
Link by link, pulling me from you.

Bits, broken pieces, all that I have.
Aching, yearning, to be captivated in your love.
A holy, jealous fire consuming me.

Joy mingled with tears of sorrow.
Of what is to come and what has been.
I repent.
I bring a ripped heart, open to you.

Blur the line of where I begin and you end.

To breathe you.
No longer desiring anything else.
Passionate pursuit,
Matching the intensity you seek after me.
Combusting into a pure refining fire when our passions collide.

You promise you will come.
Teach me to cling with all only to you.
I cry out from the depth I have yet to completely fathom.

Break me. Mold me. Shape me.

Choosing, I step into the flames.
Consume me.
All that I am with all that you are and all you desire me to be.

Stay on my knees.
Shine your light on the darkness hidden
The spiritual cancers, the pride, the need for control.

You expose to cleanse.
The fire burns.
With an intensity that matches your love for me.

Humility ushers in a new era in my life.

A journey into a realm unexplored.
There is more.
An intimacy with the living God.

I have beheld your shadow.
May I live to see you face to face.
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holy experience