War Against My Words

"But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgement for every careless word they have spoken. " - Matthew 12:36

I shudder, I cringe. I will be held accountable for every word I utter.

My tongue betrays me, no I betray my Lord with it.

A tool meant to bring healing, encouragement and grace. Too often, I surrender it to my enemy partnering with him in destruction through my words.

Help me, help me Lord. Set a guard on my lips. Brand Ephesians 4:29 on my tongue with holy fire. The power of silence I need to learn.

This warrior is tired of seeing my fellow servants cut down. I search for the evil perpetrator only to view the syllables of my words on the tip of the arrows.

I cry out for your victory in this area of my life. Complete blood bought victory to cover my weakness. I have struggled, persevered, gained ground, and yet I slip again. Righteousness, the standard and hill I choose to climb. I wage war in your power and authority against my words.

The battle rages all around us. No longer can I sit by quietly watching from the sidelines. In my vulnerability, sharing my weaknesses, exposing the cracks in my armor, all pride must flee in the light of His truth. Join me, polish your armor and wage war, calling down the victory of God's Kingdom for your life and mine.

Selfishness Dies Today

I grip a rusty nail, clutching it in my weary hand.

Today, a day to pierce. A day to crucify.

Crucify my flesh, my selfishness that has run rampant too long.

Nail it to the cross, forcing a selfish heart to surrender all as His blood drips and His mercy flows.

A daring prayer coming from the depths of my heart ... Crush me Lord, until there is nothing left of Sarah Dawn, that my life may exude a fragrant aroma and only be resurrected in your power and glory.

In His gentleness, mercy, and strength, He holds the clay of my life in His fingers and crushes. It hurts. I cry out with tears of joy mingled with the pain.

My heart exposed, my selfishness revealed in the light of His grace.

I roll the nail in my hand. A tinge of doubt. I've grown accustomed to my selfish ways.

Jesus, you took the nail for me. This time, I ask you take the hammer.

Song of My LIfe

A song bubbled from my spirit as I was washing dishes. The suds still on my hands, I sat with my journal to pour out my heart before the Lord. This spilled forth. I have asked for Him to go deeper in my life. He is beautifully answering.

"The notes have been too pretty. A song arising from my spirit.

A tune of anguish, sorrow, chords of contentment lingering.

I want my life to be a song of your praise. But my music sounds like the world.

I've been seduced by contentment. My melody wrapped in mediocrity.

A refrain of staleness playing over and over and over and over and over

Rip the sheet music away. Write only your song on my heart.

No more pretty music. No more chords that please the ear.

I want to be the notes that pierce hearts.

Give me your tune. A song of triumph, exhortation and warfare.

A life that makes the enemy shudder when he hears my melody.

Notes mingled with your Spirit, strong, loud, setting captives free.

The song of my life set to the tune of my King."

The Lord desires to co-create with us, writing our songs. What notes does He long to write on the chorus of your heart?

Along His Path

"In his heart a man plans his course, the but the Lord determines his steps" - Proverbs 16:9

As a family, we are in the midst of a journey. A journey of God's leading, obeying as He determines our steps.

It has been a delight to serve in many nations, sharing His love, and learning to hear His voice and obey. To be sure, we have been ruined for the ordinary and rejoice on the path that God continues to lead us on. And it’s just the beginning!

On our recent visit to the US, the Lord began to tug on our hearts. In the past, we had told Him that we would serve Him anywhere, except back in the US. Our hearts were closed, but God delights in changing hearts. Laying down all of our dreams and plans for the future, we finally surrendered everything, even being willing to serve on the mission field in the US.

Once we opened our hearts, the Lord started to pour into our family, directing us down a new path. We absolutely love serving in Costa Rica and we spent countless hours in prayer and sought godly counsel. I struggled, threw tantrums, and finally sat quiet enough to hear God's gentle whisper to my heart.

In a time of intercession, I cried out to God, "We will have nothing. We will have nothing." over and over again. My flesh screamed reminding me of the friends, the ministry, the children, the country that I would leave behind. Exhausted from simply pouring out all my heart, I finally listened.

My gentle Shepherd gathered me into His arms and spoke. "Sarah Dawn, you will have everything, you will have me." I love missions, I love Central America, I love Costa Rica, but I love my Lord even more.

Honestly, it is hard to leave Costa Rica, but we have committed to hearing God’s voice and radically obeying, despite the cost. Moving back to the United States is something we never thought we would do. Only God could touch our hearts in this way and guide our path. Many of you truly know our passion for Central America and missions, what must God have in store? Something beyond our wildest dreams I’m sure.

Lord as I walk on this journey, thank you for determining my steps. Teach me not only to walk in obedience, but to dance with joy along the path.

Seeds of Humility

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3: 5-6

I am honored and humbled to pour into a group of people seeking after God with their whole hearts. For an entire week, God is allowing me to shape them through His Word and help them up onto the potter's wheel. Still in awe that God delights to use broken pots like myself.

Teaching and learning this week.

Learning what it means to hear His voice. I'm such a simple sheep, but what joy that my shepherd can teach me to clearly hear his voice. I can rest in in John 10:27 and wrap His promises around me, snug and tight, keeping out the chill of doubt.

God longs to reveal His plans to those who will walk in humility, have the faith to ask, be still and wait upon Him, and walk in obedience when he speaks.

Humility, being willing to be known for who I am, no more, no less. I'm learning and cultivating it in my life right along with my students this week. This plant still needs to grow a bit more in my heart.

Today, something I wanted, selfish desires, pride, lurked in my heart. What I wanted was given to someone else and disappointment evolved into tears of sadness. Wiping away a tear, my Shepherds voice gently called to me.

Prefer your brother, Sarah Dawn. I should know, I just taught this yesterday, simple ways to cultivate humility. Time to take out the trowel and dust off my gardening gloves.

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Philippians 2: 3-4

I made a choice. I chose humility, deciding in my heart that I wanted them to have the special treasure. And instantly, the pain fled. I heard my Shepherd's voice, I rejoiced, I planted a new seed.

Hold Their Shield

As I tucked my 7 year old lil' warrior into bed, the words "Mommy, I'm sorry if I didn't please you today" spilled from his heart. His words stung and caught my attention. After sleep claimed his night, I crept into his room to battle.

As I passionately prayed for each child, a fresh mommy mandate came to mind. As children, they stand in the midst of a fierce spiritual battle. They have armor, still learning to use it, trusting for me to teach them. As mommy, God asks me to hold their shields, protecting them from the flaming arrows of the enemy. Or maybe, tuck them under mine.

My heart broke as I saw a picture of my Joshua with arrows of defeat piercing his little body. My heart sank to despair as I realized some of the arrows I shot through my words and actions. I cannot adequately describe the anguish of my soul. As I cried out to my Abba for forgiveness, His healing balm of joy erased the pain.

Forgiven, I stood to wage war and remove some arrows. I lost track of time as I proclaimed God's truth over my wounded son. The joy of victory filled the room.

This mommy warrior asked my King to renew my call, refire my passion, and refresh my spirit. In His presence, I surrendered it all, my hopes, dreams, and wants. Filled with a fresh mommy anointing I resolved to spend all that I am to equip my children for their role in His kingdom.

Today, my morning began with asking forgiveness from my lil' warriors and marching forward, victoriously!

Flowers for Mom

In the back of my Bible, I store treasures, treasures of the heart. Tucked in the fold, a well worn Mother’s Day Card reminds me of the mighty call God has placed on my life.

A woman once fretted over the usefulness of her life. She feared she was wasting her potential being a devoted wife and mother. She wondered if the time and energy she invested in her husband and children would make a difference.

At times she got discouraged because so much of what she did seemed to go unnoticed and un appreciated. “Is it worth it?” she often wondered. “Is there something better that I could be doing with my time?”

It was during these moments of questioning that she heard the still, small voice of her heavenly Father speak to her heart. “You are a wife an mother because that is what I have called you to be. Much of what you do is hidden from the public eye. But I notice. Most of what you give is done without remuneration. But I am your reward. Your husband cannot be the man I have called him to be without your support. Your influence upon him is greater than you think and more powerful than you will ever know. I bless him through your love. Your children are precious to Me. Even more precious than they are to you. I have entrusted them to your care to raise for Me. What you invest in them is an offering to Me.

You may never be in the public spotlight, but your obedience shines as a bright light before Me. Continue on. Remember you are My servant. Do all to please Me. –Roy Lessin

Continue on in the beautiful ways God is working in you and through you.

From my mommy’s heart to yours,
Sarah Dawn