Saturday, June 13, 2009

Questioning


"The Lord is good, for His mercy, tender kindness and steadfast love endure forever." -Jeremiah 33:11

His goodness never changes. It cannot be revoked, even in the midst of questioning.

This week, I questioned. I cried. I ran into His arms and ran away. At the center of the tornado, amidst the swirling emotions, a deep question. Is my God always good?

Always good to me? Always good as He leads our family on the mission field? Always good as I question? Always good .... always?

My life, the proof this week, that yes, He is always good. Despite my tantrum and torrent of emotions, He covered me with mercy and understanding. The harsh ramblings of my fear he tenderly covered with His kindness. As I pulled away with frustration, He gathered me in His arms wrapping me in His steadfast love.

Yes, my Lord is good even when I am far from it. His goodness surpasses everything I can imagine and wraps me tightly in His grace. He is good even when I question, when I cry out to Him, when I take my frustrations and concerns to His throne. He is my Abba Daddy. He holds me when I cry. He forgives me when I doubt. He calls me His Sarah Dawn and I can rest in His goodness, for it endures forever and always.
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34 comments:

PW said...

I have tears in my eyes as I read this. Thank you so much for sharing this. May the Lord bless you tonight. HUGS

Andrea said...

I cried as I read your post. My heart goes out to you....your post blessed me b/c I have endured the most difficult week in some time. Thank you for allowing GOD to speak to me thru your pain.
BLessings and prayers, andrea

Blessed Mom of 8 said...

Oh Precious friend!

Yes, He is always good!

I praise Him for never changing despite our attempts at understanding Him and His ways.

I praise Him that through the storm He is there ready to calm the storms we so often produce.

I praise Him that His love is greater than anything we can even imagine and that YES He always refers to you as HIS SARAH DAWN!

I love you,
Jill

RCUBEs said...

"His loving kindness is everlasting..." Amen! We are all vulnerable to quit sometimes as we go all these fiery trials. Still, it's His grace and love and mercy that always sustain us to keep moving forward. Your post blessed me. He is awesome! He is good! And we are so blessed to have Him as our Father...God bless sister.

Lori said...

Aren't you so thankful for His infinite ways...it is hard for our tiny finite brains to fathom, isn't it?

Truly, I sometimes wonder how in the world He can love the way He does....it's remarkable to me. Unconditional love. Wow. When you really stop to think about it, it's mind-blowing.

Our doubts, our questioning, our fears...whatever, He can handle. And He yearns to lift them from us and carry them Himself.

He is awesome.

Sandy Toes said...

He is in control!
sandy toe

Mich said...

God is good.

You are in my prayers.

Leslie said...

Thank you for visiting my blog today! My co-worker's daughter used to be at YWAM in Pittsburgh, and we were able to financially support her in a small way. She met her husband at YWAM. Unfortunately, I was unable to attend their wedding last fall because I had a miscarriage that very same week. But my lovely co-worker invited me over one day to see the wedding video.

I work for a Christian pre-school and also sponsor a child through Compassion International, so I can relate to your love of children! I pray that the adoption goes smoothly!

Thank you for serving our Lord and going abroad to teach others about His Son!

Blessings,
Leslie

Joyful mom said...

Oh friend--I have those days and weeks! Many of them. No matter what happens, my heart will always sing that He is GOOD--no matter what. He never promised us that this journey called 'life' would be easy, but He DID promise that He would be there for us when the road got difficult. Yes, indeed, His love endures forever and He IS always GOOD!

Trusting that you are doing better today, that your eyes are fixed on Him and that you are running with perseverance, sweet friend.

girlinaglasshouse said...

Sarah Dawn

As I read this refreshingly honest post I could not help but think of the dynamic in our marriage relationships. We pull away and doubt and throw our tantrums but the making up is incredible because the love is deep. God will always be the Father who runs to meet us, kissing us on the neck and holding us close. We do not sin because we doubt or question. It is part of working out our own salvation and God is big enough and grace-filled enough to handle all our moments!

Joye @ The Joyeful Journey said...

I have been praying for you!! Your honest and beautiful heart shines in this post, sweet friend. I could just feel my Abba's arms wrap around my own clamoring heart!

He spoke these words to me tonight and I feel they are for your heart as well: "I will always remember the day I placed you in your mother's arms. I wept at your birth. I so carefully and lovingly created you in your mother's womb. It was I who whispered your name in her ear.
My _______. My lovely _______. My darling daugther. My treasure.

Sue said...

God IS good... even when it doesn't FEEL like it ;-)

Thank you for your transparency today. I pray He continues to show His goodness to you, even in those times of frustration. Bless you!

Anne L.B. said...

I praise the Lord for the confidence in His love He's given me, despite the condition of the world, despite the condtion of my world.

Your photo is breathtaking. I love the Scripture you chose for it. I couldn't help but think of two others, nearby:
'Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.'
(Jeremiah 33:3 NKJV)
The LORD has appeared of old to me, saying:
"Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love;
Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.
Again I will build you, and you shall be rebuilt, O virgin of Israel!
You shall again be adorned with your tambourines,
And shall go forth in the dances of those who rejoice."
(Jeremiah 31:3-4 NKJV)

Sharon@JoyInTheTruth said...

Sarah Dawn: This is just so beautiful!

I just read this scripture yesterday (the whole Psalm 89 is wonderful):

Psalm 89:8-9, 14
"O LORD God Almighty, who is like You?
You are mighty, O LORD, and Your faithfulness surrounds You. You rule over the surging sea;
when its waves mount up, You still them.
Righteousness and justice are the foundation of Your throne; love and faithfulness go before You."

I pray this blesses you.
Beautiful post. Thank you for sharing your heart so openly. Praying you know He is carrying you and yours today!

"He tends His flock like a shepherd. He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart. He gently leads those who have young." Isaiah 40:11 Oh how I love this verse! I am so thankful He carries us close to HIs heart and gently leads those who have young (us moms)!

Hope said...

Hello Sarah Dawn,

Amen! I think we can all relate…I have struggled with that question often. God is indeed GOOD; his compassions never fail…they are new every morning: great is His faithfulness.

(From Lamentations 3:23-24)

It is good to know He has shown you His love.

♥Hope

Heart2Heart said...

Sarah Dawn,

Thank you for sharing how emotionally difficult our lives can be at times. It's only through God's grace and understanding that we can always come running back to His safe and loving arms for that comfort and love He can give unconditionally!

Love and Hugs ~ Kat

Elizabeth said...

thanks for the sweet comment on my blog today. How did you find me? It's always wonderful to hear about God's goodness in the lives of others! I agree, God is good, always! I look forward to reading more about you and your wonderful family!

Kendra Lee said...

He is so good! And He is unchanging - even when we do.

jAne said...

So nice to 'meet' you. :o)

This post speaks to my heart. Volumes. Thank you.

jAne at tickleberryfarm.blogspot.com

Jill said...

What wonderful words...and the I ran into his arms and ran away again...really touches home...
Blessings,
Jill

peggylee said...

Beautiful writting, thanks you for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. I truely believe you where sent by our Lord, to me so I could read the words that touched me deeply in my soul. I to, have been feeling like this and asking God why do I always feel like I am living in a storm? God reminded me that He is my compass and will guide me through. Love Him dearly.
blessings
peggy lee

christy rose said...

Sarah,
This is a beautiful picture of how we all have felt at one time or another in this journey we are on with our God. He is constantly reminding us as we turn to Him that His love for us is unfailing because that is who He is. And He is good because He is love. His unchanging, unfailing, unconditional love is the anchor for our souls. If He ceased to love, He would then cease to be good. His love precedes His goodness. But, both go hand in hand. God is love! God is good! All the time!!!!
Christy

patty said...

A dear friend of mine said a few years ago, in the midst of anguish, "I know God is good even though I don't always know what good looks like." I'm so glad He reassured you this week.

Thank you so much for stopping by my site & commenting...it was wonderful to hear from you.

Sandee said...

awesome and yes..He is good, isn't he..I love what patty said, even when we don't always know what good looks like.

I was struggling early last week and before, if He really was involved in our lives and why He did not seem to be..and came to the conclusion..

believe and trust....

"the evidence of things not seen"

Marsha said...

Sarah Dawn, this is simply beautiful! Thank you for sharing your heart with all of us.

And thank you for stopping by my blog Sunday. I pray you will come by anytime and hopefully find words to encourage you to press on.

My husband and I are stateside missionaries. We have our own ministry and we're located in the mountains of NC. My ministry is to troubled, at-risk teen girls and women who have been abused. My husband is a financial counselor. We live in the poorest county in the state and see poverty and abuse on a daily basis. My blog is an outlet for me.

One of our daughters is on the mission field in Kenya with her husband and 4 daughters.

Because of all this, I think I may know how to pray for you. You're definitely in a battlefield, dear one.

Have a blessed week ministering to those around you, especially your precious family.

Marsha said...

One more thing. As I was looking for your "follow" button (don't you just hate that term!) I saw you have the meanings of your children's names next to their pictures. I have prayed the meaning of my children's and grandchildren's names for many years now. I've also selected a life verse for each one and pray that as well. I firmly believe it's important to give names that have meaning.

God's Not Finished With Us Yet... said...

Hi Sarah Dawn,

I just absolutely adore your blog here and the wonderful posts that you share with others.

I wanted to let you know that I nominated this blog for the Kreative Blog Award. Please stop by my blog and copy/paste the blog award image to put on your post and follow the other instructions if you chose to accept this award. Your site really is so such a blessing to read!

Your friend and sister in Him,
Sarah

Angela @ Refresh My Soul Blog said...

Sarah! Thanks for visiting my blog. It was a divine appointment for sure. I am so blessed by reading your posts here! I will be back and keep up with you. I love your heart for the Lord! I was in tears when I read about your son and the baptism! And the talents....well lets just say that is close to home! Anyway, I have been blessed indeed. Lifting prayer for you my sweet sister in Christ! Part of our ministry at Refresh My Soul is toward helping missionaries. I would love to talk with you a bit about it sometime. If you get a chance email me. My blog has a contact button where you can send me an email.
Much love,
Angela :)

Candace Jean July 16 said...

Sarah Dawn,
I finally got a chance to splash by after you visited my sweet Lucky story. Love your heart. Your moments of frustration and angst do not go unnoticed by God. We've all been there, and He will continue to carry you through. Me too.

I'll be back for more!

Candy

Jennifer said...

Oh Sarah Dawn ... I have been refreshed and encouraged once again here at Splashin' Glory. Your transparency is such a blessing. I have felt the heaviness of doubt -- in fact the sort of doubt that for many years cut to the core of my Christian belief. Your post blessed me on so many levels, that I couldn't begin to describe it here in a comment.

So just know that it touched me in a very deep place.

Robin said...

As I drove back from the Lake today, thoughts of God's goodness towards me flooded my thoughts. His goodness is all around. Thank Sarah Dawn for sharing your heart thoughts.

fivefreemans said...

Hi sweet friend, I enjoyed talking with you today and can feel God's goodness surrounding you and your family. Know I am praying for you in this whirlwind. I love you.

Leslie

Shauna said...

Beautiful and honest - love it!

Snow White said...

Thank you; this is just what I needed to be reminded of today.